It’s your Friendly Neighbourhood Gaijin here coming to do a more personal type of blog today.
So, in Japan I discover new things about myself every day. It is always a lovely experience just getting time to meditate in the countryside of Japan and hear one’s own thoughts. I always say reflecting is very important, so that we can grow and become a bigger person. Unfortunately, I have recently discovered a fundamental part of myself which I love at times and despise at others. This part – is me being an extremely analytic scientist when it comes to everything.
When you’re in science it becomes second nature to try to understand, break down and examine every single piece of data or scenario you are given. This allows us to think rationally and within reason when we want to carry out our next actions. Then, why on Earth do I feel that not receiving a text for 6 hours is solid evidence of disinterest from my date that I just went on? That’s right. After living here for 9 months, I’ve begun to start dating in Japan – and boy is dating hard. Especially in a countryside town.
Unfortunately, in the experiment of love we scientists cannot control every single variable which arises to the table. Whether it be distance, culture, language, personality, friends, shortcomings and more – these are all things that a scientists must take into consideration when designing a proper hypothesis for their research. Though in the field of love, these variables all are intertwined into a huge net which makes up a successful relationship. Now, also my lack of experience with dating may also be a contributing factor – most of the people in my daily life know I haven’t dated a multitude of individuals in the past. Nonetheless, I think at the age of 24 I’ve reached a stage of maturity in my personality and status that I can date people the way I have always wanted to. When I was in university and high school, I never wanted to date someone with the intention that I would have to starve my own pocket or that I could not provide for them. Accompanying this reason, while having multiple unique personality quirks, I wasn’t in a place where I felt that I could confidently date someone. I did go on dates, but I never really felt like I wanted to engage in a full on relationship.
So recently I had my first date with a Japanese native and although I have no clue about their dating culture at times, my mind races and I become the Einstein of love to myself. “I haven’t received a message in X hours, I’ve read about this before. I must be getting iced by them,” or “Why are you telling me what type of boyfriend you want, we’re already on a date – can’t you just evaluate me in your head!” For some reason, that brain that always wanted a calculator in grade 10, all of a sudden has the ability to calculate quadratic equation mentally.
When I predict all of the horrible conclusions that are possible, I think “For once, I hope I’m not right,”. To clarify this quote – I’ve always tried to properly predict the exact results of my scientific experiments, leaving things to chance is as good as saying I would like you to burn $3000 conducting this experiment. My brain goes into overdrive, but I guess that’s just my heart racing and this fascinating thing people call – love.
Now I listen to a lot of music, and I know after listening to a multitude of Taylor Swift songs that finding love seems to be very difficult. I guess I need to take it one step at a time because there are a lot of things changing in my life right now. Also, dating in my own Inaka town does not seem to be the wisest unless I want everyone to immediately stick their noses into my business. In the future I will write more on the pros and cons of dating within the Inaka, but for today I will reflect with my cup of coffee looking at the beautiful mountains and cloudy sky feeling curious about what’s to come.
Have a great day everyone,